抄錄

抄錄自十年一覺電影夢

"凡練武功時, 須飽食而足睡.  修道功時, 須減食而省眠.  功成之後, 尤須壓抑.  是以武功一道, 非有堅忍不拔之志者, 難得有大成功.  非忠義純篤者, 難得有大造就.  非謙和恭敬者, 難得有好善終."

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抄錄自夢遊書

"長壽秘訣:  好肚腸一條, 慈悲心一片, 溫柔半兩, 道理三分.  --->  主材料

寬心鍋內炒, 平等盆內研碎, 用和氣湯服下.

得趁熱喝, 不能叫苦.

據說能袪傷解憂, 降肝火提精神, 兼返老還童之功."

詩人和看詩的人

留言---寫給尼采的戴奧尼蘇斯


在驚詫與追懷中走過的我們
卻沒察覺出那微微的嘆息已成留言

這就是最後最溫柔的片段了嗎    當想及
人類正在同時以怎樣的速度奔向死亡

二月過後又有六月的芬芳
在紙上我慢慢追溯設法挽留時光
季節不斷運轉    宇宙對地球保持靜觀
一切都還未發生一切為什麼都已過去
山櫻的枝椏間總好像會喚起些什麼記憶
我反覆揣摩    用極慢的動作
尋找那些可以掩藏又可以發堀的角落
將遠方戰爭與饑荒的暗影減到最低
將遲疑的期許在靜夜裡化作詩句

這就是最後最溫柔的片段了嗎    當想及
人類正在同時以怎樣的速度奔向死亡

初雪已降下    可是對於美    對於彼此
對於激情真正的誘因還是一無所知
在每一盞燈下細細寫成的詩篇
到底是不是每一顆心裡真正想要尋找的
想要讓這世界知道並且相信的語言

要深深地相信啊    不然
還能有些什麼意義    初雪已降下
當謊騙已經習慣於自身優雅細緻的型態
當生活已經變成了一處精心設計的舞台
我要怎樣才能在眾人之前
向你舉杯而不顯得突兀
要怎樣才能堅持自己的信仰不是錯誤

這就是最後最溫柔的片段了嗎    當想及
人類正在同時以怎樣的速度奔向死亡

可是    黎明從來沒有真正甦醒
當黑夜從來沒有真正來臨
這身後走過的荒漠真是太遼闊與太沉默了吧
為什麼即使已經是結伴同行
每一個人依然不肯說出自己真正的姓名

從此去橫渡那深不可測的海洋
翻覆將是必然的下場
舟子無法想像的島嶼要如何去測定方位
我只聽說越過崇高巨浪的顫慄是份狂喜
聽說    登上絕美的彼岸只有屏息
霧起與月出時的孤獨之感從未能言傳
而無論我怎樣努力    也永遠不能
在海風裡向你精確地說出我的原意

"啊!  給我們語言到底是為了
禁錮還是為了釋放?"

這就是最後最溫柔的片段了嗎    當想及
人類正在同時以怎樣的速度奔向死亡

波濤不斷向我湧來
我是螻蟻決心要橫渡這汪洋的大海
最初雖是你誘使我酩酊使我瘋狂
讓尼采作證
最後是我微笑著含淚
                                沒頂於
                                        去探訪
                                                你的路上



(錄自寫生者--席幕蓉)

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山芙蓉


(錄自寫生者--席幕蓉)


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心結


(錄自寫生者--席幕蓉)

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詩人啊!  詩人!  ---之一

為什麼有些人的詩句會一直讓你記在心裡, 有些人的卻完全忘記了呢?

為什麼有些人的詩句每次相見都好像會有些新鮮的感覺閃爍出來, 有些人的明明是第一次認識, 卻總覺得面貌模糊找不出任何特徵來呢? 

為什麼有些人的詩會讓你一次又一次地細讀, 有些人的卻在翻開書的時候就厭倦了呢? 

當然, 這其中應該有許多原因. 

包括學識, 品味, 年齡, 閱歷與滄桑等等的不同, 都可能決定一個讀者與一首詩之間的關係, 而如果再加上民族與文化之間的差異, 就會有更多的參差反映了. 

也因為如此, 所以有些詩人和藝術家就喜歡這樣說: 

        "讀者的準備總是不夠!"
(當然, 這句話我是用最簡單的字句把它說出來的, 如果用學者專家所愛用的複雜字句說出來的話, 大概又可以寫成一本大書了.)

我絕對相信這一句話. 

畫了這麼多年, 也知道有大部分的觀眾, 只能看到那浮面的色彩與線條, 並不能真正領受到創作者自我期許的內容和形式之間的關聯.  也正因為如此, 使許多高難度作品中那種有所為和有所不為的深意, 無法得到普遍的共鳴. 

但是, 當我讀到一些文章, 不斷用怨恨和譏笑的字句來責備讀者準備的不足, 並且把所有責任都放在別人肩膀上的時候, 我心裡總會有一種很深的疑惑 ---難道事實就真的只有這樣而已嗎? 

詩, 不應該是一種最抽象, 卻又最能直指人心的語言嗎? 

那麼, 你還要讀者準備什麼呢? 

九百多年來, 我們在讀蘇東坡的  "......亂石崩雲, 驚濤裂岸, 捲起千堆雪.  江山如畫, 一時多少豪傑......"  的時候, 準備過什麼? 

一千兩百多年以來, 我們在讀李白的  "君不見黃河之水天上來, 奔流到海不復回.  君不見高堂明鏡悲白髮, 朝如青絲暮成雪......"  的時候, 又準備過什麼? 

如果更早更早, 翻開詩經小雅那一篇  "采薇":

昔我往矣,
楊柳依依;
今我來思,
雨雪霏霏;
行道遲遲,
載渴載肌. 
我心悲傷,
莫知我哀. 

請問, 每一位讀過這首詩的中國人, 在深深地被感動之前, 又何嘗準備過什麼? 

詩人啊!  詩人! 


(錄自寫生者--席幕蓉)

我看臥藏

今天第二次看臥虎藏龍．　　最近看了李安的傳記, 所以老找他的影片來看. 

我最喜歡的過場,通通都是玉和余兩個女人在一起的對手戲.  第一場打鬥, 和第二次打鬥都可以算是經典.  我很喜歡.  余第二次去找玉府的那一場戲, 我也很喜歡. 

我第一看的時候, 我只記得我很不喜歡玉嬌龍這個角色.  我這一次不喜歡的程度減低一點.  但是, 我還是不喜歡李慕白.  首先我還是覺得這個角色很蒼白.  不夠豐滿, 他所想要的不夠清楚, 甚至比玉嬌龍還要不清楚.  只有瓦窯裡殺碧眼狐狸的時候, 爲他師父復仇時的台詞裡,能感覺到他存在的實在. 李和余之間的愛情實在是很淡, 我第一看的時候, 很無法體會.  第二次看, 才稍微可以感覺到. 

玉和羅的愛情,就好像小貓小狗的愛情.  到了最後在武當山碰面時, 那樣的愛情, 是無法在玉剛剛經歷的遭遇前面站立. 

兩段對話分別在兩個電影結局時, 在我腦袋浮現.  一個是余和玉聊到說,雖然余不是官宦人家, 但是很多時候, 都無法隨心處理事情. 余和玉提了一個故事,其實就是藉此解釋余和李無法結合的原因.  這一段話就在玉拿著解藥回瓦窯, 看到李慕白死掉時浮現在我的腦袋裡.  第二段, 是玉和羅在武當山碰面時, 我就已經想到羅之前說的那個傳說.  當然, 這段話一定是這是我第二次看的緣故...  所以我的腦袋已經先行拼湊了. 

fighting and the flow of platforming

I was watching blade of darkness on youtube yesterday.  It was painful to see the movement of platforming.  I don't understand why platforming is so hard to integrated with combat...  But I have a GBA game of Bruce Lee, it's a platform game.  But the focus was on the melee combat as well.  The flow of the platform was very slow and tedious.  Compare with Mario, Mario's fighting mechanic was extremely easy, "jump on enemies", which to me could be viewed as a part of platforming. But of course, Mario is very vulnerable, simply by contacting with enemies, he die. 

It is simply true that when the combat become complex, the gameflow stops at one spot.  Oni is probably a little bit different.  But that game was not designed with platforming in mind.  Pop Sot series was another example that tried be different.  But while they focus on platforming, the combat becomes arcady. 

Blade of darkness was made with combat in focus.   Oni was too, but the flow was different.  POP Sot series felt limited in times in terms of platforming, and its combat was arcady, although fluid.  I wish for a game with a realistic fighting, integrated well with fluid and free platforming.  The problem with Assassin's creed's fighting mechanics is arcady like POP Sot series.  Players don't have all the control...  I'd wish for a beautiful kill shot, but how to get there should be worthwhile.  The fighting mechanics has to be like a fighting game. 

一個日本人唱的

Massachusetts

Bee Gees

Feel I'm goin back to massachusetts,
Somethings telling me I must go home.
And the lights all went out in massachusetts
The day I left her standing on her own.

Tried to hitch a ride to san francisco,
Gotta do the things I wanna do.
And the lights all went out in massachusetts
They brought me back to see my way with you.

Talk about the life in massachusetts,
Speak about the people I have seen,
And the lights all went out in massachusetts
And massachusetts is one place I have seen.

I will remember massachusetts...

昨天我媽媽聽到這首歌, 他說這是一首歌, 他聽到的. 是一個日本人在爸爸的診所裡聽說,媽媽要來滿山秋色, 他馬上就唱起了這首歌, 整一首.  很有趣的故事.  故記之.

我看十年一覺電影

讓我印象深刻的部分:

李安說, 別人都聽不懂他說的話.  (序)

李安不斷說中國的教育不好.

李安平常說話很小心, 深怕得罪, 似乎有點恐懼.  但是, 在講到他本行和學術上的課題時,他則是滔滔不絕.  

 他對於電影裡的對話很用心.  他在拍到臥虎藏龍為止, 他認為中文電影的對白很貧乏, 很無力.  讓我印象深刻的一段是,  the fugitive 的導演讚美李安的中文片裡, 各種隱喻手法用的好棒時, 李安自己想到的是, 美國人可以直接講出來, 而中國人不行...  所以才得用隱喻.... 

他的武俠片心得不少,他對大俠的定義卻很表面化. 

李安心裡很矛盾, 不喜歡中國的東西, 卻又丟不掉... 

他擔心好萊屋學會了中國武俠片的特技之後, 中國還有啥?  我也有這想法. 

他非常虛心好學.  我覺得他能夠在這一行和他所學的知識上保持一種中心, 不偏不倚.  知之為知之, 不知為不知. 而且知道了後能變化, 能在問題前面拿得出答案.  這在他自己來說叫做, common sense (街頭智慧). 

暫時就這樣...吧... 

媽看理性與感性

他覺得愛情方面很牽強.  但他同意我說的姊妹之情卻是非常好看.  我覺得這和我看其他 jane austin 的電影是一樣的感覺.  可能因為 jane austin 自己對愛情非常嚮往,卻無法真正享受愛情.  可是他卻有很多真實的姊妹情深.  

easier to understand

hunger is a feeling that's easier to comprehend.  love is not. 
輕輕柔柔是愛, 但是罵你也可以是愛. 

hunger is always hunger, a feeling of need to eat. 

losing cat

When I got home from work yesterday, mom told me to call aunt, who said to call her.  I went to phone and saw 2 new messages, which were both from aunt.  One message was saying her cat was gone missing and needed help.  The other one was saying call her on her cell phone, because she's outside looking for the cat. 

I called and found out that she was back in the house, but cat was still gone missing.  I went over with my mom immediately.  She sounded very urgent on her messages, and she sounded dreaded on the phone.  I am very familiar with the feeling, because I was used to go all over the neighborhood and call out my cats names. 

My uncle's is very dusty these days, they are doing some renovations.  Aunt said that they stepped out and came back at noon.  They could not find the cat anywhere then, so they assumed that the cat fled to the outdoor, because the loud noise from the renovations.  They usually locked the cat in a room but forgot to do so in the morning.  When we arrived, she immediately put the coat on.  Yes, she did go around the yard and street a few times, but she was eager to do it again.  While she was patrolling her back yard, I told her I would look at the indoor again.  Just to make sure the cat really went out.  I went upstairs, basement, and garage.  No, there's no sign of it.  But yet again, he's in the hiding, there's no way to find him in the heap of rubble.  I went outside to join aunt.  Mom stayed inside, she forgot to bring a hat, the early spring twilight was freezing. 

We went around the yard, a dog from neighborhood was chasing us along the border with his dance and barking.  I found my cats on the tree before so I asked, but aunt said unlikely.  I was holding the cat's food bucket, shook it every few steps.  Aunt was talking about to think like a cat.  Can't think like a human, or otherwise, we could just look at the paved, dark asphalt road.  There was a breakage on the back fence, yes, the cat might flee from the place.  Aunt and I called out the cat's nickname, guai!  Guai!, Guai!  There's no reaction.  Then we decided to go the street behind their house.  We called out the cat's name along the pavement whilst shaking the food bucket.  It was kind weird to hear aunt call out her cat's name on the street.  My sister was looking at me bizarre as I was doing it a few times before.  Aunt talked to neighbors, one was next door, she just got home.  Another one was selling her house so she won't be around often.  There's a father, who was playing hockey with his son, allowed us to look for the cat in his back yard.  We called and called, but without any results.  Aunt kept saying her cat was easy to spot, a white, long hair, big cat and there's not many places to hide...  I said, nah, there are lots of places to hide, if he's trying to...

We went back home, I was hoping to the cat eating at the front door, aunt put some water and food there.  But no.  She decided to put a cardboard box besides the food and water, in case the cat got back so he could have a place to stay overnight.  We went over the yard again, and aunt decided to look for the cat in another street.  When we went back to the house to get the food bucket, my mom was yelling out.  The cat ran through the garage door to the kitchen.  The cat looked startled, and immediately went up the stairs.  Aunt was giddy.  In fact we were all happy.  Mom was asking if aunt wanted to come over to have dinner with us.  But she said she needed to spent some time with the cat.  Yeah, I understood the feeling.  The overwhelming happiness was unspeakable, it filled the chest and the mouth.  It was so strong, it might rattles the hands and bodies a little as well!