不能睡， 寫寫，幫助睡眠

 I saw Ashley was working on something at Shoppify then on QB.  She has three monitors, one of them was constantly on ChaGPT.  It keeps me up at tonight.  It makes me anxious.  I was working on something to put publications list into shoppify using export sheet from tablet format.  But for some reason I think Gemmiinii was wrong then.  But it kept insist on its way, though i asked for the source of his solution, the link he provided is not working anymore...  I am now wondering if we can use pagggyfll's table function?  

Anyway, I guess I also have this fear of missing out as well.  Because we see marketing team tried all kinds of shiny tools.  And yet, my team did not.  It seems we are stuck with the just spreadsheets.  Anyway, we have to use what is at our disposal.  But I don't feel the We...  The other two members do not as involve as I was, or I feel so.   I am just so tired of thinking alone and working alone on how to improve the process.  And I also wish to learn something new.  

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I am still thinking about Naya.  Though I know it's an illusion.  I am like that.  I go everywhere and I fell for somebody.  Today is A, tomrrow is B.  It never stops.  But I know it's an illusion.  It's just so hard to  get aways from this feeling.  I don't know if it's the same feeling I feel when I was working or during the off hour and still thinking about or that name just keeps appears in my mind.  I just feel so alone.  I just feel so alone.  I know it's my problem.  And I know this feeling is not just me.  I need to find someway to make myself happy and forget about this.  Just remember this, to stay away, far and away.  And as long as I don't say, nobody would know.  Even if they feel something, as long as I don't say, I will be fine.  

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I worked remotely yesterday.  Because I was trying to call HEating assistance.  HAAFFner told me to.  It was an interesting experience.  I called, but no one is picking up.  So eventually I went down to the office at essex street in lawrence.  I talked to a lady, who was sitting in a crowded room with file drawers all around her.  She's short and wear a big glasses.  She's quite sharp, and the only I saw that speak without an accent.  Or least I could not hear it.  She's quick in making the decision and said she'll contact HaaFFner and told me to leave and wait for her call.  Then pretty quickly, she called when I was still on the way home.  I went home to wait for Haaffner's call.  After Haaffer knew that I will pay even if heating assistance won't.  They send someone in around 11.  A two person team, I think one is apprentice.  They fixed around 230.  

It was an experience.  I think maybe because we have a pretty complete record through out the years.  They can make that decision rather quickly.  Though the phone did not work, but they complete the work in a few hours.  I am impressed.  

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I saw a movie today with my mom, it's called threeBagsFull, a sheet detective story.  My mom left with 30 minutes left.  She's bored.  I felt a bit cheesy.  But I still like the movie though.  There are many interesting things in there.  I am really quite impressed with how they could show the sheep as sheep, not overly Anthropomorphism.   There are many interesting conversations.  I like it quite a bit.  And plus, I feel like they know what this movie is about, they did not make it over the top.  The production really is quite good.  Recommended for something a little off beat.  

Then I searched a little bit and found out it's was an German Fiction in the early 2000s.  Pretty cool that it was made into a movie.  I doubted if it's not because the high tech company's super rich, it will ever be made.  And it was made in the right way by the right team.  

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太好笑了！

 I was looking for a chinese song yujian  by sun yanzi.  But hilariously my favorite version is frm an old lady singing on the street...  lol  

And I was surprised that YT did not have this version.  I've searching for a few weeks on YT for not reults.  

My sister is going to laugh at me, old lady singing, old men singing...  

Movie and book Afterthought - Hamnet

我終於看完了哈姆奈特， 書和電影。  我不怎麼喜歡這本書， 原因是百分之八十五的故事都只是心裡描述。  我甚至懷疑這書到底有沒有故事劇情？  整本書中間除了死神選錯人以外都沒有高潮。  壓抑的情節幾乎貫穿整本書。  不過，在通過百分九十五的鋪陳之後， 結局稍微補救了一些。  

當然我承認， 我幾乎是翻書似的看完它。  只要我可以了解這一段大概要講甚麼， 我就跳過去了。  有百分之六十五都是這樣的。  但即便如此， 我還是花了不少時間看。  因為一放下來就不怎麼想再拿起來，除了少數的情節。  而且我覺得不少人物的設定在我看滿樣板的。  主角和世俗格格不入的性格，傳統女性的壓抑， 還有啥是新的呢？  倒是我覺得 Agnes 和 Bartholomew 之間兄妹的關係我滿喜歡的。  充滿了解和信任，有一種生母過世後， 相依為命的姊弟之情。  當然， 我覺得這裡 Agnes 和 莎翁的夫妻之情其實也寫得滿成功的。  事實上， 用旁敲側擊的方式來描寫莎翁的喪子之痛和 Agnes 一樣深沉， 是滿高明的寫法。  

就電影而言， 我覺得其實和小說配著看也還好。  我在看完小說後有點不確定導演要怎麼拍， 因為幾乎全是內心描述。  我和我媽一起看的， 看完後，我問他看的都懂嗎？  他說都懂。  我想電影其實拍得還可以。  雖說有滿多事情沒法像小說交代得那麼清楚， 但是我覺得也夠了。  尤其是看過小說的， 其他細節可以自己補齊。  就電影來說， 我覺得演員是很用力演了， 但是， 這戲的劇情本就薄弱。  而且因為時間跨度滿大的， 每一段往往用一個黑幕來做結束， 變成好像一小集一小集那樣。  有點可惜。  另外就是， 最後的場景我覺得電影也沒有書本來的好。  也不差， 但和書本相較之下， 就差了點。  甚至有為了要讓觀眾了解， 台詞必須講出來， 但是有些感情真的是講出來就差點。  這電影的攝影， 音樂都很棒。  不果我也得說， 以現在來說， 我目前還沒看到一部電影把這兩樣做不好的。  可以有不同的風格， 但是沒有不好的。  所以應該要問的問題是， 攝影和音樂有沒有把這部電影的精神抓出來， 並且造成它獨特的風格？  我感覺還是有的， 尤其是攝影。  我對音樂的感覺往往沒有攝影敏感， 除非我再看幾遍， 我這裡也不再賣瓜了。  

說到最後， 我依然要回到故事的劇情。  我感覺這本書更像是作者的寫作練習。  這種故事的鋪陳到最後一個橋段才讓我感覺有點意義。  而這意義並不能讓給我一種切身的強烈， 另外， 這種老舊的劇情並不是不能寫的更引人入勝， 所以對我而言這是此書失敗的地方。  我還是知道了一點劇情來看的。  所以當最後獨到 Agnes 看到阿姆雷特時的描寫， 我還是非常感動的。  但是在感動完之後， 那感情卻沒能留很久。  我知道這種評論好像是說看書或電影是為了給我某種悸動而且可以長時間體驗， 幾乎像上癮。  我覺得這是不公平的。  我卻無法為了那最後一場的感動而肯定之前百分之九十五的故事。  

Movie afterthought...or feeling

SentimentalValue spoiler alert

I watched this last month.  I like it very very much!  The theme of the movie is about movie making.  This is kind of a slow movie.  But director brilliantly mixed present and flash backs, keeps it interesting.  And I saw a comment online saying the flashback was actually narrated by the house itself, i thought it made senses.  

I only saw two actors before, one is ElleFanning, the other is StellanSkarsgard.  I love them both, espeically ElleFanning, a tremendous Actor.  I like her performance here so much.  Her role was really out of place in the whole movie, the shining American movie star.  And one of the most memorable section of the movie was the comparison of her acting for a scene and RenateReinsve's acting on the exact same scene in a script.  

I was going to watch TW's 左撇子女孩，but it was so raw that scared me a little.  I had so much apprehension about the ending that I switched to SentimentalValue.  The basic difference between the two I think was really the sound and music.  

The photography of SV was just beautiful.   The conflict between daughter and father, the love between the sisters.  Both Stellan and Elle's vulnerability in the movie was also palpable, especially when the characters were forcing to make the movie, when both them, especially  the director, know it's now working.  I feel as an audience we can just see it, without any commentary.  Palpable is a good word to describe the scene.  

The movie's story was really quite interesting, when you think about it.  I like Stuckman's word to describe this movie, personal.  A father wanted his daughter to play a part of his own memory from his youth.  But he did not know that his daughter actually had a similar experience.  Once that was revealed, it really packed a punch.  

It's cringe for me.

 Spurs beat Thunder in game 7 last night.  I stayed up late to wait for the highlight.  Though I was happy to see Spurs won.  It was cringe to see Wemby scores.  The way he is scoring is really for a 6 foot point guard.  And people are simply praised him for it...  How sad to see a 7' 6" guy struggling with people 1 food shorter than him.  I hope he can stay healthy to play another 20 years, but I have my doubt.  Dirk is 7', he can shoot three, but the way he plays for mid range is a lot more different than Wemby.  I feel he knows how to use height,  but not Wemby.  I truly feel like if Wemby perfected Skyhooks, maybe he could play more than 10 years.  I think Wemby's real asset for Spurs is really defense.  Spurs offense is really the whole team, I think the manager is first to be praised, the second the the coach and coaching staff.  Look at Harper, Castle, and all the team mates were so good, If Wemby is not playing, they are still a great team.  Maybe a bit weaker in the defense.  But their scoring will remain the same.  There're countless game like this, but all the media only mentioned how great Wemby is...  If Wemby can't find a better way to score inside, it's such a waste of talents...  

And for NBA, there's no point to watch it anymore...  The inconsistent of the referree is the real reason for this game 7.  It feels so much that NBA is controlling the game with referee...  Totally lost confidence in NBA.  Yeah, I will still want some highlights in the future, but no more than that...  

I think I will start to follow FIBA instead...  

Some thoughts

 So I was writing down some thoughts about a work related topic yesterday.   It is something bothers me for sometimes.  Since I came to work at this place, I feel like I did a couple things that's quite important for the company in terms of general procedures on Picking orders, Requesting items, and Receiving packages.  I don't need to go into detail now.  But I feel there are many aspects that can be improved upon.  So I even made a Receiving log, which compiled all the Receiving record through out the years.  Of course, I've expressed this thoughts to Maya, David, and Kevin before.  One of the goal is to be able to calculate SKU with their respected Lot and all the Lot related information together.  And by doing such, we can get better current lot results in Picking list.  And then the middle goal is that we can work remotely as order team.  The long term goal is eventually this going to help migrate to a new system, maybe a database working either in QB or along side of QB database with lot and lot related Product information.  

But while I was doing it last night, something dawned on me.  I like to do this more than shipping and receiving.  But what is it that I am doing?  Is it system design?  I am not sure.  What I know is that it is something that's visible and gives me a satisfaction.  But I feel there's a step that I do not know how to move from forward.  

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I just checked what's the average time I spend on youtube.  It is well over 2 hours; IG is 48 min.  Both numbers are ridiculous.  And the funny thing is that google showed me the age group for using this apps, the older the group, the less people spend on them, especially IG...  My group is about 25 min per day.  Me?  Double the time...  That's total of more than 3 hours on social media.  Mainly just short video now.  Is that why I feel brain rot?  

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I left TK for an embarrassing reason.  But I was going to buy those cooking oil thing...  le sigh.  

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I went and played Ping Pong at BTTC.  I played quite hard yesterday, kept bending my knees and swinging hard.   I enjoyed a good workout, when I left, my should was killing me.  And I can feel it in my body this morning.   When I was leaving, only played about 2 hours, but I was starving.  One of the OG was surprised to see me go, he said many people went for a sandwich then came back for more.  But like I said my should hurts as well, so I still left.  It's probably one of the most intense time I had over there.  Kind like it.  

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今天的紀錄

 我正聽著 joniMitchell 的 BothSidesNow。  好奇怪，從 Coda 聽到這首歌的當下還不怎麼樣。  可是後來就一直聽。  現在聽的是 NewportFolkFestival2022， 快八十歲了鳩尼現場唱， 有 CardiB 和。 不知怎地我實在好喜歡好喜歡。  似乎可以一直聽下去， 不斷重複。  

Random

 因為他沒有光 (約翰福音 11:10)  

不知道為啥，剛坐下來就想到這句話。  這大概是我自己對自己的寫照。  不過， 更接近事實的應該是: 「因為他閉上了眼睛。」