中庸 我殆已

天命之謂性，率性之謂道，修道之謂教。道也者，不可須臾離也，可離非道也。是故君子戒慎乎其所不睹，恐懼乎其所不聞。莫見乎隱，莫顯乎微。故君子慎其獨 也。喜怒哀樂之未發，謂之中；發而皆中節，謂之和；中也者，天下之大本也；和也者，天下之達道也。致中和，天地位焉，萬物育焉。

這是中庸第一章. 我對一般的解釋都不很滿意. 胡思亂想之下, 竟然也有一些想法. 不過孔子說的, 思而不學則殆. 我想想, 現在寫下來, 如果將來有機會, 自己或有長進. 那時再回來看看自己這時的思想, 也頗有意思.

天命之謂性, 率性之謂道, 修道之謂教. 我覺得, 這三句話先把三個字, 性, 道, 教, 他們之間的關係和定義講明了. 在這裡, 所謂性, 即是天命. 道, 就是率性. 教, 就是修道. 如果像數學公式, 我就可以把他寫成, 天命之謂性, 率天命(性)之謂道, 修率天命(道)之為教. 這樣看起來, 念起來都好奇怪. 我稍微解釋一下我的想法.

天命, 就是天賦予人的一切東西. 這東西就是你所有的一切, 包括可見到的或不可見到的; 可見到的是你的身體髮膚, 甚至可以說你的器官; 不能見到的包括你的基因, 你的個性.

率性之謂道. 率性在我看就是人用上天賦予他的身體和個性做事. 這個率字就是用, 或領導, 甚至可以是遵循的意思. 所以在這裡, 道沒啥高深的解釋. 道在這裡就是說, 人用他的稟賦做事. 作啥事? 這不是這裡的討論. 這純粹只是個定義. 文章一開始就決定, 道在這裡的意思就是人用他的稟賦做事. 人用他的稟賦做事就是道.

修道之謂教. 教在我看來只有一個意思, 他可以是改變人用他自己稟賦做事的任何原因. 這個原因可以是母親的棍子, 父親嚴厲的眼神, 鄰居高壯男孩的拳頭, 或者是飢寒富貴. 因為這些東西都可能改變人的行為. 教, 當然或許更可以是一種信仰, 或者是宗教, 或者是一種學術. 只要是對人的行為有所影響的都可以謂之教. 因為他改變了人的行為, 意即修道(人用他的稟賦做事就是道), 這就是我對這一句話的解釋.

如果上我三句話一起解釋, 我說:

上天賦與人的一切秉性叫做性, 人順著自己的個性, 想法, 身體的強弱等等而行動就叫做道, 最後, 我們把對我們的意識行動有所影響的事情, 譬如學術, 信仰, 宗教, 都定義為教.

這就是我對這三句話的解釋. 再來, 我試著用沿著上面的想法來解釋下面幾句.

道也者，不可須臾離也，可離非道也。

這個道, 是否還是指人依秉性行動呢? 我認為是的. 所以整句話的意思就是說, 人必然得依著上天所賦予的本性, 包括思想, 個性, 身體的強弱來做事. 沒有一個人可以例外. 如果說, 某些行動是可以只有嘴巴上講講, 但是卻做不到, 甚至是做到了卻有害於自身, 那麼那個道就不是我們所定義的道.

以上是想了很久很久才想到的. 甚至可以說是今天, 12/30/2009, 才想到的! 長久以來, 我始終都不了解為啥這文章裡只講道, 而不談教. 因為似乎, 儒教應該要談教. 而不是道. 但是今天如果說, 教是任何可以改變行為的因素, 那麼這文章裡的確是不需要談到教. 但是更困難的地方是後面的:

是故君子戒慎乎其所不睹，恐懼乎其所不聞。莫見乎隱，莫顯乎微。故君子慎其獨 也。

我不了解說, 這文章是如何突然從定義性道教後, 轉到說君子都是戒慎恐懼, 要小心他自己獨處的時候... 但是, 他並不是在定義性道教後真的突然轉到戒慎恐懼的. 他是再一次強調行為的定義之後才提到慎獨. 在我看, 文章裡對教是很小心對待的. 不是所要的教都好. 意思是, 不是所有修道的教都是可行的, 我感覺這裡更可以衍生出並不是同一個教對每一個人都適合的意思. 所以我目前對於戒慎恐懼的幾句話解釋為:

因此, 君子對於教, 我在想就是各種, 想法, 信仰, 甚至宗教, 學術都要小心謹慎的對待之. 這些都會對人的行為有所影響, 而這些影響又是如此不容易為人所察覺. 因此一個君子要很真心的面對他自己才是.

再深一曾講, 對於體察自己的行為和心理是需要一番功夫的. 這就是莫見乎隱, 莫顯乎微. 自己內心的感覺, 往往在最微小的行為中顯現. 自己對自己的觀察是得要真心, 也就是慎.

之後中庸第一章繼續說:

喜怒哀樂之未發，謂之中；發而皆中節，謂之和；中也者，天下之大本也；和也者，天下之達道也。致中和，天地位焉，萬物育焉。

這裡我還沒想到哩... 哈哈. 如果要我現在說, 那我就會說, 這一段, 還是先定義了中和. 沒有喜怒哀樂謂之中; 喜怒哀樂發出來和外界的情況沒有相差太遠, 就叫做和. 中也就是沒有喜努哀樂的狀態是自然的本來面貌; 和呢, 就是所有生物個體的表現. 達致中和的狀態, 就好像天地一樣的恆久不變, 但是卻又如萬物孕育其中而生生不息.

現在, 我把所有的解釋放在一起看看會如何:

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上天賦與人的一切東西叫做性, 人順著這個上天所賦予的稟賦, 包括自己的個性, 想法, 身體的強弱等等而行動就叫做道, 最後, 我們把對我們的意識行動有所影響的事情, 譬如學術, 信仰, 宗教等等, 都定義為教.

人必然得依著上天所賦予的本性, 包括思想, 個性, 身體的強弱來做事. 沒有一個人可以例外. 如果說, 某些靠著教的行動, 根本做不到, (甚至是做到了卻有害於自身,) 那麼那個道就不是我們所定義的道.

因此, 君子對於教, 也就是各種, 想法, 信仰, 甚至宗教, 學術都要小心謹慎的對待之. 這些都是會對人的行為有所影響, 而這些影響又是如此不易為人所察覺. 所以一個君子要很真心的面對他自己才是.

再深一層講, 對於體察自己的行為和心理是需要一番功夫的. 這就是莫見乎隱, 莫顯乎微. 自己內心的感覺, 往往在最微小的行為中顯現. 自己對自己的觀察是得要真心, 也就是慎.

沒有喜怒哀樂的狀態謂之中; 喜怒哀樂發出來和外界的情況沒有相差太遠, 就叫做和. 中也就是沒有喜努哀樂的狀態是自然的本來面貌; 和呢, 就是所有生物個體的表現. 達致中和的狀態, 就好像天地一樣的恆久不變, 但是卻又如萬物孕育其中而生生不息.


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我覺得其他段都勉強可以, 但是最後一段和倒數第二段卻很有些距離. 似乎本來是在說教的影響, 但是在末段突然轉到喜怒哀樂去. 怪怪的. 我或許可以自圓其說: 因為末二段最後在說要真心體察自己, 所以末段講的喜怒哀樂也就是仔細的體察自己的本性. 但是終究有不通處. 實際上, 我覺得末段是和首段相呼應. 中和性呼應, 和與道呼應. 這應該是不可疑的. 但是末二段和末段的連接處實在得要再用力思考或應證...

鄭燮---乳母詩

12/26/2009 星期六晚上去姚能叔叔家吃飯. 隨手翻閱他架上的藏書. 看到 鄭板橋全集, 裡面的-乳母詩很是令人感動. 回到家後, 在網上找到, 錄之:


乳母費 氏，先祖母蔡太孺人之侍婢也。燮四歲喪母，育於費氏。時值歲饑，費自食於外，服勞於內。每晨起，負燮入市中，以一錢市一餅置燮手，然後治他事。間有魚飧瓜 果，必先食燮，然後夫妻子母可得食也。數年，費益不支，其夫謀去，乳母不敢言，然長帶淚痕。日取太孺人舊衣濺洗補綴，汲水盈缸滿甕；又買薪數十束積灶下， 不數日竟去矣！燮晨入其室，空空然，見破床敗几縱橫；視其灶猶溫，有飯一盞，菜一盅，藏釜內，即常所飼燮者也。燮痛哭，竟亦不能食矣！後三年，來歸侍太孺 人，撫育倍摯。又三十四年而卒，壽七十有六。方來歸之明年，其子俊得操江提塘官，屢迎養之，卒不去，以太孺人及燮故。燮成進士，乃喜曰：「吾撫幼主成名， 兒子得八品官，復何恨！」遂以無疾終。

乳母詩曰：

平生所負恩，不獨一乳母。長恨富貴遲，遂令慚恧久。

黃泉路迂闊，白髮人老醜。食祿千萬鍾，不如餅在手。

(http://blog.udn.com/yan0707/2650336)

english chinese translation of SPICE...

coriander: 香菜.
cumin: 孜然.
fennel: 小茴香.
star anise: 八角(北方稱大茴, 或大料; 南方稱八角 {李梅仙先生說的}, 似乎也有人稱茴香).
bay leave: 月桂葉.


finally...
i hope this time, they are all correct terms....

memorable moments playing video games

1. the first time i played the final stage of pyro in Sacrifice. i dominated Ambassador Buta overwhelmingly. at one point, i got all his souls. and there he was, all alone. i thought to myself. HA! it's a easy kill! so i led my creatures in to kill him. as i approached him, he started to yell out a spell, and i was wondering... how's that gonna do you any good? then i experienced my first devastating power of the ultimate spells in Sacrifice. a pillar of lava shot from ground to the sky, along with rocks flying out of ground. most of my creatures are kill instantly! the rest died by the flying rocks soon afterward. my wizard was killed also. my gosh!!! that was one of the most overwhelming experience i've ever had in video games!!! and i have to say, ever since then, not a single spell effect in any other video games could impress me even a bit!

2. i love total war series. i like history. i think it's natural for those history lovers feeling overwhelmed when they found a game, where players could control army against another army on the battlefield. there are so many precious moments i spent in total war series. one of the most memorable was when i was doing Shogun total war warlord edition's tutorial. the voice directed me in the tutorial was a very good! he gave me a feeling of japanese speaking english. when i followed his direction. he praised me. but the first time i wasn't doing his bidding, he immediately lashed out! and suddenly, it felt like i was really in a training session in japan at that period of time! it was both hilarious and memorable!

3. one of the memorable moment in playing video game was when i was playing MDK. i think it was a very early level in the game. i was blocked by a huge wall. there's no way to go forward. i used my sniper scope to observe what should i do. then i saw it... i was almost laughing on the ground! the enemies was mooning me in a tower behind the wall! they were up there doing all the crazy gestures, laughing at me!

4. there's another very memorable moment in MDK. i think it's either right in the middle of the game, or right pass the mid point of the game. i felt through a shaft, or a hole. then i was trapped! i could not go forward much and neither were the other 3 directions feasible. the place looked great! with green pature and blue sky all around and above me. but i just could not go anywhere! i was so mad! i forgot now how did i come to the solution of that puzzle now. but it doesn't matter. because the solution was so outrageously funny! i just need to shoot! then, all the pastures around me was just pieces of cardboard, which enemies put there to confuse me!! that's the most funniest moment in games i've ever experienced!!

5. king's quest mask of eternity was a very memorable game to me! because it's the first game i've ever bought for PC, one of those decisions made solely by myself without regret! in terms of gameplay mechanic, it's a bit clunky. but there were few things i wish it could make to the other games, ie., the freedom of camera control. one the most memorable video game memories was from that game as well! it's a swamp level. i love the music in there. the music really made the atmosphere in the game! and somehow, the creatures in there were fun to hunt as well! the whole affair felt really like a swamp hunting to me! with a background music that was beautiful!

6. prince of persia sands of time was a very special game! when i first played it, i liked it. but the combat was kind hard to figure it out with mouse and keyboard. there's an important moment in the that suddenly put this game on my favorite list! the moment was in the sultan's bird cage. that where prince first conversed to himself about the feeling towards the princess! immediately, a light dawned on me! and i was thinking...i know...the princess was really something, wasn't she!!! that's almost felt like the first time i saw girls that i treasured in my memories of them!

7. tenchu 1. the moment was in the tutorial. the game's music was very very good. but the memory was when i first used stealth kills. before the first stealthy kills, i had to fight face to face with a few samurais. and those were horrible moments. so i tried to sneak without being noticed. after i got used to the control. i stuck to a wall around a corner. a guard came up without noticing me. i have no idea what should i do next. then, i pressed a button... the rest was history, oh, wait, the guard was history! the awesome animation and pixel blood was just fantastic.... the stealth kill animation of both ninja and guard really gave a tremendous satisfaction!

some people

MiltonE.Miles The Sino-American Cooperative Organization (SACO)
Henry Morgenthau, Jr. US Secretary of the Treasury during FDR (Morgenthau Diaries)
lauchlin currie,
harry dexter white,
w. langhorn bond, head of china national aviation corp
dr. harry baker, former head of the us red cross in china
W. Averell Harriman, US ambassador for Russia from 1943 to 1946
John Birch (missionary), US intelligent officer
Michael Lindsay
Herbert O. Yardley
Bodo von Stein & Erich Stoelzner German military adviser in china
Cordell Hull, US secretary of state under Roosevelt for 11 years from 1933 to 1944
William Henry Donald, an australian news correspondent.
蕭信如(勃) 中美合作所
arthur N. young (books: China and the Helping Hand, China's Nation-Building Effort 1927-1937,China's
Wartime Finance and Inflation 1937-1945)
John Leighton Stuart(司徒雷登)
Donald Nelson China War Production Board Eddie [Edwin A., Jr.] Locke
Bretton Woods system(monetary system, something aout foreign exchange rate)
William Slim, 1st Viscount Slim (first burma campaign english army)
Harold Alexander, 1st Earl Alexander of Tunis(first burma campaign, english army)
cyril roger (抗戰中幫中國搞金融的英國人
Clarence E. Gauss: USA diplomat
Nelson T. Johnson: USA diplomat
archibald clark kerr, 1st baron inverchapel
Sir Hughe Montgomery Knatchbull-Hugessen
horace james seymour
patrick J. hurley
joseph stilwell
claire chennault
喬家才
潘漢年
Alexander Ernst Alfred Hermann von Falkenhausen german military adviser
錢秀玲

羅宋湯

羅宋湯為啥叫羅宋湯呢? 原來羅宋兩個字其實是 Russia! 這個湯是俄國湯! 這個湯傳到上海的時候, 上海人就把這個湯叫做羅宋湯! 我在想, 羅宋會不會是羅剎的上海發音... 其實, 這個用英文來寫好像是: borscht. 傳統上, 這個湯是用甜菜作的. 但是上海人好像不怎麼喜歡. 所以後來又加以改良. 說不定是因為南方比較沒有甜菜, 所以後來, 才改用大量的番茄.

其實, 這一道湯在整個東歐中歐都很盛行. 各個叫法, 拼法也有不同: Czech: boršč, Estonian: borš, Lithuanian: barščiai, Polish: barszcz, Romanian: borș, Russian: борщ, borshch, Ukrainian: борщ, borshch, Yiddish: בארשט, borscht. 各地方的做法也有出入. 例如, 雖說大部分的羅宋湯都用甜菜, 但是好像波蘭的就不用. 可能各人的湯底或許也有所不同, 但似乎從中也可以找到一些規律. 譬如說我在 youtube 上面看到幾個影片, 雞豬牛都可以作湯底. 但是他們都用一個剝了皮的整個洋蔥, 兩片月桂葉, 和一些胡椒來熬那些肉.


以上的資料大多來自維基.

隨想

突然想到的:

對於華人來說, 其實學習中文最好的方法還是背書. 無論是死背, 編成歌謠, 至少要可以念的滾瓜爛熟. 這樣會加深對這個語言的認識! 背書的人不見得是可以說出這樣做的好處在哪兒, 但是我現在突然感覺一定會有巨大的好處!!

我以短淺的認知猜中文對於腦袋有很大的好處. 但是因為太著重在視覺的效果, 對於語音的敏感度有時候會降低. 所以古人對於朗讀非常重視. 因為這又助於聽覺上的接收. 背書的效果是把間接的視覺效果轉而變成比較直接的聽覺. 這樣對於語言和文字的融合有很大的助力!

這個大概是從最近一個國文教師的笑話得來的感想.

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對於中文而言, 現在的標點符號的改進和推廣是一個巨大的進步! 恐怕遠比白話文的推廣還重要!

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random thoughts

steps of making a dreamed game:

first: design a basic PC fighting game. it's game with two fighters on a single flat platform. the gameplay is purely fighting game. but with camera behind character's back. online is essential.

second: design a PC fighting game. it still has two fighters on a single flat platform. but now, players could choose to go hand to hand, cold weapon to cold weapon, or hand to cold weapon combat. camera still stuck behind character's back. online is essential.

third: design a PC fighting game. it's time to give players different play options. the difficulty could be scaled, between total arcade like experience, something similar to the soul calibur, or more towards the realistic gameplay, similar to bushido blade, weapon or hand. it's also time to introduce basic platforming into the fighting game. it means two characters fighting on a single flat platforms no more. hard lock on and soft lock on system should be introduced with basic playforming. camera still stuck behind character's back. online is essential.

fourth: design a PC fighting game. it's time to make fighting mechanics recognize different heights. designers should start to integrate fighting mechanics with platforming gameplay. camera still stuck behind character's back. online is essential.

fifth: design a PC fighting game. if it's popular enough, i'll assume there're modders out there modding the games. either they are tweaking the fighting mechanic, or designing new stages. it's time to refine fighting and platforming gameplay into a much higher level. by which i meant that player's option to adjust games towards more arcadish or realistic. realistic, means that players might have more controls, the fight will be more brutal, like one slash kill. arcadish means, that players have more options for mistakes. the control will be more relaxed. finally, introduce different modes of gameplay involving both fighting mechanics and platforming mechanics.

sixth: design a PC fighting/action/adventure game. the game should be story driven, so designers could facilitate what gameplay or level designs they want their players to experience. make free level design kit to everyone who bought the game. game character fight with hard lock on, soft lock on. he could also enter a state of mind where game characters could not fight but could have a cursor outside of their body to point at other details, something like Sacrifice.

seventh: design a PC fighting/action/adventure/strategy game/RPG game. most importantly, i want designers to add features to the sixth games. the game became a platforms for modders, non modders. it could also be a add on, in which designers hope to accommodate community with ability to use the same engine, fighting mechanics, platformers, to create a game they want to create. designers should think of a way to integrate the already existed with new gameplay mechanics. for example, the players could use the level design kit to design fantasy game. but the original game may not include fireball in it's free level design kit, it's time to add on.