李清照可比陸放翁 阮文達
----------馬星野先生函述對兩位詞人的看法
"陸游與李清照" 及 "再談李清照" 兩文刊出後, 又承馬星野先生賜長函指教, 對其在 "讀報觀影罪言" 中, 以陸游與李清照相比, 作了詳盡的說明. 馬先生為新聞文化界眾望所歸的耆宿. 我雖未獲親沾教澤, 但其門人子弟中, 甚多與我相交極深, 因而我對馬先生的光風霽月, 亦久已心嚮往之. 我寫那兩篇專欄的動機, 文章已經明白交代, 絕無易安, 放翁不能相提並論知意; 尤其是馬先生以其德望為社會風氣沉淪, 作此振臂之呼, 我即曾作論評予以響應. 談李清照, 不過是鑒於當前激勵民心士氣的作品太少, 藉此以抒個人感喟而已. 汪公紀先生和馬先生同是我最敬重的先進, 縱有見仁見智的看法, 卻同是憂國憂時, 讀者如將我的兩篇專欄與馬先生來函對照一讀, 便知根本上並無衝突之處; 但我仍願在此向馬先生致萬分歉意!
下面是馬先生的來信全文:
文達先生:
我是你專欄 "隨緣隨筆" 的固定讀者, 素佩彩筆有光. 前讀 "談陸游與李清照"兩篇大作 (中有公紀兄之投函), 提及我在中央日報刊出的一篇 "罪言" 中的 "男的不作陸游, 女的不作李清照" 的兩句話, 指出了許多卓見. 致為感謝.
陸游與李清照, 是否相同類型的人物, 能否相提並論, 我決不敢固執己見, 但他們二人在文學上, 在品格, 同樣是百代同欽, 其作品萬口爭傳, 是不分軒輊的. 因為我讀書不多, 只是童年時讀過放翁的劍南詩抄與易安的漱玉詞, 至今猶能記憶, 認為放翁易安, 同為我畢生最欽佩之文豪, 唐有杜甫, 漢有班昭, 南宋有放翁易安, 均為奇葩美玉, 光輝萬丈, 此點, 先生及公紀兄亦有同感.
先生指出陸游亦有兒女情長之文字, 而已 "釵頭鳳" 為例, 而易安則所作全為 "亡國之哀音, 終其生只是為恩愛夫婦生活歌頌, 為家庭破碎而哀怨." 似乎先生所指陸游與李清照, 比擬不倫, 陸游只能與辛棄疾相比. 其實, 陸游的愛國懷鄉與李清照之故國情深, 詩詞多少, 雖有不同, 其心情是一樣的. 而放翁之對於唐氏表妹(他的妻子)與易安之永懷趙明誠(他的丈夫), 同樣是忠于愛情, 刻骨銘心, 永矢不諼(ㄒㄩㄢ)的神聖愛情, 而這種對愛情的忠實, 與一人對國家之忠, 對父母之笑一樣可敬的.
長生殿作者洪昉思, 在該劇開端時便說: "昭白日, 垂青史, 感金石, 迴天地, 算臣忠子孝, 總由情至." 我們不能因李清照之愛國詩詞份量少, 而說她只解兒女私情, 也不能因為陸游愛國詩多, 而說他一味豪壯. 李清照之忠于愛情, 古人多有完論, 改嫁之說, 為忌妒者之造謠(詳見李清照集二三五頁). 李清照雖屬女流, 但批評起同時代文豪如柳永等, 是絲毫不客氣的: "露華倒影柳三變, 桂子飄香張九成", 這便是他不齒柳永等靡靡之音的直率詩句. 所以當時文人, 已為他十分驕傲, 因而造謠誹謗, 倒說他改嫁張某為話頭. 改嫁在現在看來, 不算一回事, 在當時 "一女不事二夫" 的道德律下, 事很被人看不起的.
李清照之招謗, 由於他大膽批評柳永等. 他說: "本朝(宋)柳屯田永, 變舊聲作新聲, 出樂章集, 大得聲稱于世. 雖協音律, 而詞語塵下, 又有張子野, 宋子京兄弟沈啓, 元絳, 晁次膺, 等輩出, 雖時有妙語, 而破碎何足名家. 至晏丞相(殊), 歐楊永叔(修), 蘇子瞻(軾), 學際夫人, 作為小歌詞, 直如酌蠡水於大海, 然皆句讀不葺(ㄑ一ˋ)之詩耳, 又往往不協音律..." 這一段話, 把北宋南渡前後大名家, 統統批評, 難怪他受盡謠諑, 然終得湔雪. 李清照到了垂老, 還要學花木蘭, 有詩曰: "佛貍定見卯年死, 貴賤紛紛尚流徙, 滿眼驊騮及綠耳, 時危安得真致此. 木蘭橫戈好女子, 老兵不復志千里, 但願將相過淮水." 當時易安居士以五十三歲.
李易安金石錄前後序中, 可見其與趙明誠蒐集中國金石之苦心, 由其是南渡之後, 明誠病死, 易安以一孤孀, 將數千件文物東搬西搬, 喪失殆盡, 其辛苦及悲哀之情, 其愛護中華國寶之深, 非今日收藏家之所及. 故在中國文化上, 中國文學上, 人格風采上, 李易安在女性中, 真千古一人, 豈遜于錄放翁.
我前月看張至雲小姐演出 "玉唐春", 審判官紅袍說: 王金龍可比得上鄭元和(李娃傳中男主角), 對面藍袍說: "那鄭元和是前輩先生, 哪能與王公子來比, 比不得." 孫麗虹演王金龍, 堅持著說, "比得的, 比得的!" 我覺得用李清照比陸游, 也是 "比得的, 比得的!"
嬉笑之言, 尚乞阮先生雅諒, 亦請對宋代詩詞興趣的學者文豪們, 賜教賜教, 即請
筆安!
---------------馬星野敬上
(我花了兩個小時才把這篇文章搬上來, 目的只為了倒數第二段. "比得的, 比得的!" 感覺這個結尾實在很古代!我現在累了, 等那天或許再想說啥...)
(阮文達是我外公的書, 他喜歡的. 他過世時, 從舅舅家拿來的. 好像是媽媽拿的. 也算記念吧...)
Sunday, October 07, 2018
a quote about happiness
Happiness is not a goal...it's a by-product of a life well lived. ---Eleanor Roosevelt
Saw this a while ago. Thought it really meaningful. And as usual went and searched for it's source. I found it is from a book Eleanor wrote in 1960.
The whole quote is a bit different, I don't know why.
"Happiness is not a goal, it is a by-product. Paradoxically, the one sure way not to be happy is deliberately to map out a way of life in which one would please oneself completely and exclusively. After a short time, a very short time, there would be little that one really enjoyed. For what keeps our interest in life and makes us look forward to tomorrow is giving pleasure to other people."
Saw this at brainpickings.org. The article quotes another paragraph right behind the above ones:
"It is easy to slip into self-absorption and it is equally fatal. When one becomes absorbed in himself, in his health, in his personal problems, or in the small details of daily living, he is, at the same time losing interest in other people; worse, he is losing his ties to life. From that it is an easy step to losing interest in the world and in life itself. That is the beginning of death. "
I find I am that quotation, just by admitting it is living the words... By golly...
Tuesday, October 02, 2018
Writing something
我一直都有一種奇怪的現象. 就是我自己獨處的時候, 我就會開始徬徨. 一種完全迷路的感覺. 我知道自己在那裡, 可是下一步是啥, 卻是全無著落. 甚至自己要做甚麼也很無確定. 那種迷恍, 足以震動自己是否存在的意識. 那個時候, 就算腦袋裏閃過有啥事要做的時候, 都把這些事都否決掉, 大部分時候, 連要啥事要做的想法都無.
昨天就是這樣. 今天依然如此. 我總覺得我得寫一寫, 可是這事已經想了好久好久! 為啥下手做事是這樣的困難.
昨天就是這樣. 今天依然如此. 我總覺得我得寫一寫, 可是這事已經想了好久好久! 為啥下手做事是這樣的困難.
Something to write
It's been almost 3 months now since my last entry.
I've been dabbing in Postal service throughout the summer. I mean not just an Assistant Rural Carrier, which only works on Sunday and Holiday. I also worked on weekdays, basically worked as a regular part time, like an RCA(Rural Carrier Assistant). The Middleton office needed quite a bit of help during summer time. There are people taking two week vocation, and other people sporadically taking days off as well. There are 4 routes with regular carriers, and 1 route without. And there's only 2 RCA between July and August. I did route 1 for quite a bit during that time. My trainer, Stephanie was really good at gauging how much I could do so I won't be overwhelmed. At the end, I could deliver about 75% of route 1 by myself. But casing the mail and sorting packages into delivery order was a whole different matter.
I used to work as UPS driver's assistant for seasonal job for 3 years. I always believed that I could work as a package deliverer. But mail is another matter. The volume itself is a significant increase. The sorting part is hard for me too. There're categories of letters, Flats, small parcels, and large parcels(packages), and weekly bulk mails(market basket weekly..etc). I still need about 4 hours to case all of them, might not include the pull down time(pull the letter, flats, and small parcels down from shelves into trays...). Then there's the packages. They don't print out packages list for us. The regular carriers are so used to the routes, they could simply just remember them. I can't do that, I need to first write them down, and then put tags in between mails to remind myself. As of this moment, I tried to just use the list. But the placement of package is a issue as well. How to quickly get to each package is still hard for me. I know the general location of each package but still need to finger through many of them to get to the right ones. As for casing the mail, I felt that I know enough to sort mails onto shelves. But after I finish casing the letters, it's usually 11:30! I should finish casing at around 930! That's 2 hour difference!
And for the last two weeks, my speed was shrank dramatically! I don't know it's due to fatigue, or my sickness. I've been sick for almost a month now. It started at the end of summer. I could feel it. When I was driving around, there's no people around me. That somehow unchecked me inside. I would feel intense emotion, usually sadness, anger, hatred, or jealousy. I kept thinking of her, not being able to be with her made me really sad, it's an gut wrench, everything just smashed into each other. I felt intense sadness. Then I would ask myself questions. My answers trigger rage, then it turned into hatred, and started to count all of my weakness. Then I would think of people that worthy of her. It went into a cycle, jealousy, rage, sadness. I would yell, even cry while driving.
But maybe it's not all bad. I mentioned those because, bad memories burned the biggest hole in our psychic? I like to sing, I like to see the dogs on routes. I just saw an adorable tiny chow chow last week! My gosh, he was adorable. There was another dog at 15 Norma, I really loved that dog. I knew he was independent the first time I saw him. He just followed my every move the first time, extremely alert. The second time I needed to get off the truck to deliver a package, he followed me and barked. He even tried to get behind me. He was a perfect guard dog. But when I talked to Donna, the regular on the route, she first apologized that she should remind me of that dog. She did not realize that I really liked the dog! :)
I am not sure how long I will be able to put up with this though. I do miss working with people. In the beginning, I told myself, if its easy, do it quickly and accurately. Like, "會計當而已矣". But after 3 months, I still could not get it done efficiently, the frustration started to brew.
-------------------------------
榕要回台灣了. 一開始是美芳告訴我的, 繼而胡熒阿姨也和我說了. Tom 的婚禮上, 榕也證實這一點. 之後, 榕的男友也總算來了美國一次. 我鼓起了勇氣跟其他人要照片, 但是, 其他人都沒有回應. 我又想用一本之前買的一本本子做記念冊. 我收集了一些照片, 拖了一段時光. 到最後
才來看怎麼把這本冊子裝訂完成...太晚了! 結果我只好急急的上 shutterfly 做了一本記念冊. 雖說照片收集, 和照片合成之前都做了一點. 但是畢竟太急, 東西來的時候, 差強人意... 大大差強人意. 重複的照片, 照片的大小, 文字的點綴.... 不談了. :p 另外, 現在我才知道榕是十月十四才要離開美國... 實在沒必要那麼趕...
這個星期五要去 Jo 家 party, 算是歡送. 我也被邀請, 每次感覺見到榕都感覺是最後一次. 這次大概是真的最後一次了. 不知道要怎麼謝謝 Jo...
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I've been dabbing in Postal service throughout the summer. I mean not just an Assistant Rural Carrier, which only works on Sunday and Holiday. I also worked on weekdays, basically worked as a regular part time, like an RCA(Rural Carrier Assistant). The Middleton office needed quite a bit of help during summer time. There are people taking two week vocation, and other people sporadically taking days off as well. There are 4 routes with regular carriers, and 1 route without. And there's only 2 RCA between July and August. I did route 1 for quite a bit during that time. My trainer, Stephanie was really good at gauging how much I could do so I won't be overwhelmed. At the end, I could deliver about 75% of route 1 by myself. But casing the mail and sorting packages into delivery order was a whole different matter.
I used to work as UPS driver's assistant for seasonal job for 3 years. I always believed that I could work as a package deliverer. But mail is another matter. The volume itself is a significant increase. The sorting part is hard for me too. There're categories of letters, Flats, small parcels, and large parcels(packages), and weekly bulk mails(market basket weekly..etc). I still need about 4 hours to case all of them, might not include the pull down time(pull the letter, flats, and small parcels down from shelves into trays...). Then there's the packages. They don't print out packages list for us. The regular carriers are so used to the routes, they could simply just remember them. I can't do that, I need to first write them down, and then put tags in between mails to remind myself. As of this moment, I tried to just use the list. But the placement of package is a issue as well. How to quickly get to each package is still hard for me. I know the general location of each package but still need to finger through many of them to get to the right ones. As for casing the mail, I felt that I know enough to sort mails onto shelves. But after I finish casing the letters, it's usually 11:30! I should finish casing at around 930! That's 2 hour difference!
And for the last two weeks, my speed was shrank dramatically! I don't know it's due to fatigue, or my sickness. I've been sick for almost a month now. It started at the end of summer. I could feel it. When I was driving around, there's no people around me. That somehow unchecked me inside. I would feel intense emotion, usually sadness, anger, hatred, or jealousy. I kept thinking of her, not being able to be with her made me really sad, it's an gut wrench, everything just smashed into each other. I felt intense sadness. Then I would ask myself questions. My answers trigger rage, then it turned into hatred, and started to count all of my weakness. Then I would think of people that worthy of her. It went into a cycle, jealousy, rage, sadness. I would yell, even cry while driving.
But maybe it's not all bad. I mentioned those because, bad memories burned the biggest hole in our psychic? I like to sing, I like to see the dogs on routes. I just saw an adorable tiny chow chow last week! My gosh, he was adorable. There was another dog at 15 Norma, I really loved that dog. I knew he was independent the first time I saw him. He just followed my every move the first time, extremely alert. The second time I needed to get off the truck to deliver a package, he followed me and barked. He even tried to get behind me. He was a perfect guard dog. But when I talked to Donna, the regular on the route, she first apologized that she should remind me of that dog. She did not realize that I really liked the dog! :)
I am not sure how long I will be able to put up with this though. I do miss working with people. In the beginning, I told myself, if its easy, do it quickly and accurately. Like, "會計當而已矣". But after 3 months, I still could not get it done efficiently, the frustration started to brew.
-------------------------------
榕要回台灣了. 一開始是美芳告訴我的, 繼而胡熒阿姨也和我說了. Tom 的婚禮上, 榕也證實這一點. 之後, 榕的男友也總算來了美國一次. 我鼓起了勇氣跟其他人要照片, 但是, 其他人都沒有回應. 我又想用一本之前買的一本本子做記念冊. 我收集了一些照片, 拖了一段時光. 到最後
才來看怎麼把這本冊子裝訂完成...太晚了! 結果我只好急急的上 shutterfly 做了一本記念冊. 雖說照片收集, 和照片合成之前都做了一點. 但是畢竟太急, 東西來的時候, 差強人意... 大大差強人意. 重複的照片, 照片的大小, 文字的點綴.... 不談了. :p 另外, 現在我才知道榕是十月十四才要離開美國... 實在沒必要那麼趕...
這個星期五要去 Jo 家 party, 算是歡送. 我也被邀請, 每次感覺見到榕都感覺是最後一次. 這次大概是真的最後一次了. 不知道要怎麼謝謝 Jo...
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