i saw Maria's uniform folded neatly on the chair when i walked in at noon on monday. that made me feel sad. i was alone, now, i was even more so. i was scared of doc and getting tired of the whole thing. i felt that i had all the obligation to stay for the job. i felt i can't just quit the job to screw doc. i can't go for census job because i was not able to quit. i felt that linda introduced me to the job, i was somehow afraid i would ruin linda's relationship with doc. i felt that my mom loved this job more than other jobs i had before. i should stay on it. my aunt encouraged me to stay because i could learn a lot more from a boss i don't like. i felt that i needed this challenge too. but somehow the sum of all these made me miserable. thinking back now, the feeling of inescapable trap must make me so depressed. and i am not one who could pretend well. i worked 6 days a week in my fourth and fifth week. if you look at the schedule of the clinic, it was not too much. monday and wednesday were the only days i need to go from 5 am to 7 pm. the other days were only half days. and on saturday, there's only one hour of operation.
from the beginning of the fourth week, i continue my calling with lawyers. now doc wanted to expand his list from stoneham to winchester, woburn, burlington, and many areas. i printed out lists of attorneys at law from all those areas and called them. i was very slow. doc was annoyed by it. when the business was open, i needed to be the receptionist. the first week after Maria left, many people was asking, where's Maria? that's just great. that part of the job was actually ok for me. making appointment on the appointment book, writing notice to customers, filing, all the tedious job and else. at least i could keep my mind occupied or at worst divert some of the energy from those crazy, depressed inner chat. however, there were actually lots of time where i got nothing to do but wait. since the business started, i can't get back on jobs like calling lawyers. all i could do was organized the some scheduling slips, getting phone calls, and wait. there're lots of problems for me to be a receptionist. one of them was billing. doc never really explained how billing worked in the clinic. Sarah did not tell me much besides the most basic. it's' not her fault, since she was already gone after one and half weeks i was starting. when some question arose, the only thing i could do was to tell the customer to wait for doc. i had a hard time doing it. some of them might slipped out of door. doc was annoyed.
my calling of lawyers was finally pulled by doc. it was too slow and inefficient, i guess. i needed to typed those lawyers i got in doc's contact list. that's painful too. but good things was that doc had to go to some sort of seminar during the weekends, that includes my second, third and fourth weekend. that's a bit of relief. however, i could not stop complaining to my mom. i didn't feel that she cared about too much how i feel. i was growing madder and madder each week. on my fifth week i finally had to work on saturday. doc got a promotion that day. he slyly asked me if i was able to work on saturday. i really did not wish to, but i had to. in the office there's only me, who else? it seemed that he needed me to setup all the wires too. on saturday, after an hour of operation, we went across to the same gym again. doc got his girlfriend to help out. i got home almost 4. well, that's nothing. right? i was making money. i should be happy. the money was not too bad, the job was not too hard, what else could i possibly want?
the following week, there were a few new patient came from the promotion. one of them came in on tuesday afternoon around 1. it's a usual routine, i gave out a bunch of sheets for her to fill out all her information. doc put her in a room to do just that. after a while, she came out and said that she did not feel comfortable to put out all those information. she decided to go. although very nervous, i pulled the, "please wait, doc would like to speak with you before you leave." routine. i went in and told doc about it. doc had me doing something in the back. he went to front and started deal with the new customer. doc was somehow pissed at her and started to yell at the new customer. then it seemed that customer was willing to filled out the form again. doc put her back in the room. i was watering the plants, i think, when the new customer rushed out of the room. she walked right to the front desk, put all the papers down on the counters. then she rushed out of the door. i yelled out, hold on, to no avail. when i realized what just happened, i yelled to the back to doc. doc jogged to the door and checked if the new customer was still there. she's gone already. i could see doc was annoyed. but i would find out just how much he was annoyed next morning.
i was of course affected by the new customer walked out incident. all i could do was yelled out hold on, then, yelled to doc what was happening. and i felt so weird that doc would yell at the new customer. i thought that was a suicide. when i went in the next morning at 6, i was very depressed. i could not help wanting to leave earnestly. doc started with foul mouth, picking on some little things. then he started to lash out. eventually he exploded. he had a great ride on me. it must be a awesome scene in a movie. but i hated, disgusted deep in my guts. he kept on saying how important the customer really was. how his business was built upon each and every customer he could get. all the pay check i got was from those customers... simply let a customer running out was unacceptable...blah...blah...blah. all i could do was telling him i was quitting. he said ok, but he needed time. then before beginning the business, he wanted to hold hands and pray to god. great, piety.
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